Idle Talk
9 October 2003
I’m going to start this e-mail in a typical Namibian
fashion:
Greetings colleagues.
So-o, I don’t really have anything to say…it’s only that…[insert
2 hour meeting about “nothing” here].
But really, not much is happening around here.
It’s hot—high of 103F today. HIV/AIDS
club is going along somewhat haphazardly. The
teacher I’m doing it with, my “counterpart” doesn’t seem
too committed so I’m mostly doing it alone.
Classes are going fairly well with my 11th graders.
They alternate between surprising me with how smart they are and then how
“intellectually challenged” they are. I’m
pretty ready to be finished with the grade 9s.
Now that the weather is so hot, nobody wants to be in class, myself
included. But at least the 9th
graders continue to entertain me. In
the English book, we’re doing a little unit on lightning laws (ie, how to not
die in the summer). So I’m
thinking, what can I do with these kids and lightning?
I’ve got it! I’ll have
them make up songs about lightning. Somehow,
the dumber the idea, the better it works. So
today, in small groups, the learners all got up and sang or rapped about the
lightning laws such as “Don’t stand in water” “Avoid metal objects”
and “Stay away from the telephone.” Some
were pretty terrible, a few were good, and all were hilarious.
***
When I was walking home from school today, one of my ninth
grade boys ran up behind me, “Miss! Miss!”
“Yes, Shaanika?”
“Miss, do you want to buy a chicken?”
“What would I do with a chicken?”
“Miss, you eat it!”
“Is it alive?”
“Yes, but I can kill it for you.”
“Will you also take the feathers off?”
“Yes.”
“Why do you want to sell me a chicken?”
“Miss, to get money.”
“What do you need money for?”
“To buy things.”
“Like what?”
“To buy our needs.”
“Like what?”
“Miss, our needs.”
“Okay, I will talk to Mr. Zac.”
***
Since I apparently don’t spend enough time with my
students already, I decided to start a Palaver Club.
What’s a “palaver” you ask? Well,
it has a multitude of definitions, depending on which dictionary you consult.
Here are a few of my favorites:
1. Loud and
confused and empty talk
2. Speak
(about unimportant matters) rapidly and incessantly
3. Idle talk
4. Misleading
or beguiling speech
5. A long
parley, usually between people of different cultures or levels of sophistication
I advertised the club to just my 11th
graders, by saying I was a wealth of completely useless information and ideas,
and if anyone would like to sit around and idly talk rapidly and incessantly
about them, they should join my club. To
apply, they just had to make a list of at least 10 questions starting with WHY?
I got a response from 21 of the best and brightest (mostly from 11B and
11C; probably because I “forgot” to tell 11A).
The questions ranged from truly inquisitive to smart aleck.
Here’s a sampling (I’ve left all errors fully in tact):
 |
Why
women are not pre-missive to hunt their lover? |
|
Why
do we have two legs? |
|
Why
do some male people donot grow hairs in their head? |
|
Why
do people kiss? (on lips) |
|
Why
do people have different skin colors? |
|
Why
are some pure liquids colorless? |
|
Why
do almost all the people believe there is god? |
|
Why
are mules infertile? |
|
Why
are most wild animals of the same type have one colour e.g. giraffes,
cheetahs, leopards, kudus, gemsboks, e.t.c. unlike the domestic ones e.g. we
find cattle in different colours? |
|
Why
is life like this (born and die)? |
|
Why
do love hurts? |
|
Why
do people have hair under their arm? |
|
Why
are blacks always considered low? |
|
Why
do people talk but not animals? |
|
Why
do people sees colour on the day time but not night time? |
|
Why
people are clever than other animals? |
|
Why
do people say there’s god if no-one have seen god in their life? |
|
Why
do brides carry flowers? |
|
Why
cats, when they fall off, they always land on their feets why not at their
back or something? |
|
Why
famous people divorce after months or a year in marriage? |
|
Why
do a rabbit sock brings good luck? |
|
Why
does God talk to certain people? |
|
Why
is there hatred between people and wild animals? |
|
Why
is Jesus always made white in movies? |
|
Why
males have breast, 4 what? |
|
Why
you let yourself to be a teacher? |
|
Why
we need to take waste product out of body? |
|
Why
people wears clothes? |
|
Why
do people gets into sexually relationship? |
|
Why
is their hatred between people in this world of us? |
|
Why
do some people know how to witch and some don’t if we are all from one
god? |
|
Why
President W. Bush is arrogant? |
|
Why
development is important for countries? |
|
Why
do some people try even hard to study but still they do not get at the
positions they want to be? |
|
Why
monkeys look almost the same as people? |
|
Why
do girls wear trousers while boy don’t wear skirts? |
|
Why
do people scandalizer? |
|
Why
do people have cultures? |
|
Why
some learners use to do well at lower grades but latter they will be stupid
in school work? |
|
Why
people are not using condom even they know there is AIDS? |
|
Why
can’t we found out that the globe is round when we’re standing on it but
only when the saterite do it’s job? |
|
Why
people smoke? |
|
Why
are white people called white if they are more pink than white and black
people are called black but they are more brown than black? |
|
Why
does why start with w? Why
doesn’t why start with y? |
|
Why
do we get angry with other people, why can’t we just correct each other
and stay happilly? |
